original artists
filk authors
what's new
about this site
Original song Bohemian Rhapsody
Original artist Queen
Filk author Ben
Intro Open Source-ish filk/pisstake of the Linux/Windows antagonism.

Windowsian Crapsody

Windowsian Crapsody (C) Ben 1999 and stuff.

Is this a real OS?
Is this insanity?
Caught in a niche buy,
No escape from the GUI.
Open your eyes, look into your files and see,
Bill's just a rich boy, he needs no sympathy,
Because it's sloppy code, full of bloat, really crap, really slow,
Any way to sell 'dows doesn't really matter you see; s'not free.

Linus, just killed a corp.,
Put a gnu against its head, read the licence, now it's dead.
Linus, my code had just begun,
And now I've gone and ftp'd it all away.
Linus, GNU, Didn't mean to make(1L) you compile,
If your prompt's not back again this time tomorrow,
switch to /dev/ttyp1, and kill the PID that matters.

Too late, shutdown(8) has come,
Sends SIGTERM down my spine, cron jobs failing all the time.
Logout, ev'rybody, It's got to go,
Gotta re-compile the kernel; patch the goof.
Linus, d00d, don't want to lose uptime,
I sometimes wish I'd never been touch(1)'ed at all.

<cue MIDI-embedded web page of hampsterdance doing the guitar solo>

I see a little silhouetto of a plan,
ESR, ESR, is it catherdral or bazzaaro?
Underground of coding, very, very worrying Bill!
(Mo-no-poly.) Mo-no-poly. (Mo-no-poly.) Mo-no-poly. Mo-no-poly figures he, Magnifico? Eric; poor rich-boy, everybody loves he.
He's just a poor boy from a vi(1) family,
Spare him his life from this emacs-monstrosity.
Easy come, easy go, will you let me code.
Mozilla! No, we will not let you code.
(Let him code!) Mozilla! We will not let you code.
(Let him code!) Mozilla! We will not let you code.
(Let me code!) Will not let you code.
(Let me code!) Will not let you code. (Let me code!) Ah.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
(Oh Jolt-Cola, Jolt-Cola.) Jolt-Cola, let me code.
Billzebub has Windows put aside for me, for you, for thee.

<cue frenzied accordian playing by Mahir>

So you think you can install it and spit in Bill's eye.
So you think you can lilo(8), then leave it to die.
Oh, baby, it's not that easy, no baby,
There's little support, there's little support for your games.

Porting really matters, switch to BSD,
Porting really matters,
Porting really matters to me.

Anyway, it's "Wind'blows"...

<JenniCAM on the gong>

0-9 / A / B / C / D / E / F / G / H / I / J / K / L / M / N / O / P / Q / R / S / T / U / V / W / X / Y / Z